Fat girls unite!

Ah, Friday... I love Fridays! This was a particularly (sp??) long week, between girl scout cookies and the food projects going on in the department, well, let's just say the scale is not going to be kind this week, i am sure. On a bright note though, I have tried to work out more to compensate. I hope to be surprised but yet I am going to be realistic!

Off that topic, I feel like making a banner that says "FAT GIRLS UNITE!". Nothing against you skinny people, I am truly happy that there are people in the world who don't have to worry too much about weight but there are some of us who are just consumed by it. Every bite that goes in our mouth becomes and obsession whether it is while we are shoving it in or after the fact. Even right now, the sucker in mouth is a thought! It is preventing me from running down and grabbing a candy bar!!

I had a long talk this week with a friend of a friend at a gathering and just for the record, i think she is so cute! I love her style and she is so fun to talk to! Anyway, who knows how it got brought up but she seems to be in the same boat as I am. I bet there are tons of girls out there just like me and her. I think we need to unite and help each other out! Not in a setting like weight watchers or some crazy slim fast support group, but some place where we can be real and just let it out. Therapy!! And if we get skinny, we'll still be in the group, not to flaunt but to celebrate! Hmmmm...

(PS who created the stupid name Slim Fast??? Anyone in their right mind should know that the words slim and fast are oxymorons!!!

How 'bout a little Self-talk?

I am so glad this is not a requirement... I suck at it! Oh well, a little effort is better than none, right? These last few days have been really rough as far as food is concerned. There have been food projects in classes and all the leftovers end up in the office and therefore part of my ass. It is also girl scout cookie time. WD bought 2 boxes, they lasted less than a day. My dear friend had her daughter call me and ask if i would buy from her. SNEAKY!!! Sure, I'll take two. How can I say no to her!?? Just for future reference, I will not answer her calls this time of year next year. Those are gone now. So, I am sure the scale will not be kind this week. I did make it to the gym yesterday and i am going this evening. I will just work extra hard and maybe the scale will at least stay the same.

I do need to get back on the self-talk wagon.
I hate cookies!
I hate coke! (As i sit here sipping!)
(Seriously, can I just get a caffine injection or how about a sucker?)
I hate icecream,
I hate chocolate,
I LOVE SALAD!!!
I LOVE FRUIT!!
I LOVE VEGGIES!!

Count 'em... FOUR

Okay, off my butt now and back in gear. I didn't really fall of the wagon just the blog wagon. It takes time and that is something that I have been finding to be in short supply lately!

Without blogging though, I have been good. Not perfect but good. My sleep has been robbed lately so I have been having a coke here and there and a mocha every now and then but I still am only drinking water in the morning and throughout most of the day.

The biggest thing, well, maybe not the biggest but it is pretty big... I have lost FOUR pounds! It feels so good and I can honestly say that my pants feel just a little less tight. That is the best! I have to stay the path and keep going.

The biggest thing is that I now have a buddy in this journey and I am so excited. Now if we could just get connected for a workout or two!!

So as for my orginally stated goals, the coke habit... the journal... the eat less crap... I think I have done pretty well. It is time to add on. Remember baby steps!
Okay, so I haven't thought about any goals until just this moment when I typed that and I don't want to just slop something down just for the sake of making something up and filling this space. Goals, new goals, drum roll, what will they be??

fast forward?

What a weekend! We went to Monster Jam and it was more fun than I truly imagined. Of course this lent itself to bad eating. I didn't do terrible though. I did have 2 large beers which probably went straight to the ass. Oh well... still on the wagon.

I did decide that except for a glass of wine here and there, I am going to cut alcohol for a while. Especially beer. It just makes me feel so bloated. blah. Despite all of that though, I have lost 2 pounds. I am really excited about this! I have to call this progress! More importantly though, I have cut soda significantly. I do not rely on my morning DC... I cannot even begin to describe the feeling it is to not have to have a coke in the morning. I have also cut out most crap eating. I am definitely mindful when I eat and it is a choice when I put crap in my mouth... it is not just mindless eating and I find that i am eating less crap! It feels good! I wish i could fast forward to the end and see what I look like 50 pounds lighter!!

Thoughts

I sent this in an email message to a friend yesterday and thought I should post it here as a reminder of my new way of thinking...

I fell off a little yesterday but it wasn't a total train wreck. It is just too damn hard to resist the goodies!! Yesterday at work I over heard a co-worker say to another "Isn't it your turn to bring in donuts?" I turned around and said pretty shitty "please don't!" She looks at me and says, "okay bagels then". I just repeated my please don't and walked away. Skinny people are really clueless is all I have to say!! It drives me nuts. I think I will bring in a fruit tray tomorrow.

Take a little...

I love the morning. I thought I would never say that in my lifetime but it is true. It is so quiet and peaceful. The world is still. It is a great time for reflection. Today, on what, I don't know. These last few days have been pretty good food wise. I made it back to the gym yesterday and logged another 30 minutes. I am really dragging this morning but besides that... I feel good. I didn't mention this earlier but over the weekend we won a Wii in a raffle. I ran out and bought the wii fit so besides the treadmill, I have been doing a lot of that. It is really difficult but fun. I don't even realize I am working my body until I wake up. I just need to set aside some "me" wii time and dedicate to it.

I still have not seen any results of my efforts which makes me what to hang it up. I can't. I know if I do, I'll just put on another 50 pounds. I think I am going to start weight watchers officially. That will probably help me stay on track. I just need to be so so strick with it... Maybe by this time next week I will see the little needle on the scale pointing a little less to the right. I'll take a little, that is all I am asking for.

Oh to be a 10...

Busy busy... too busy to sit down here and make a note. I have hit a few rough patches and fell off the wagon a bit. Eating out will certainly do that! Yesterday was a fun day and I tried to eat well but I had starbucks and a sweet treat there with the giant coffee. I did eat a salad with my lunch so that was good but then ate a bag of doritos for dinner. Oh well, it was a road trip with my favorite gal pals from college.

I finally made it in to the gym. I walked at a pretty good pace for 20 minutes, ran for 2 and then walked another 8. It was almost 2 miles. I am quite proud. Now I just need to find time every day to do that!! I guess if I go at 8 pm, I go at 8. I am going to try to get in at least 3 days a week. Hopefully, i will start seeing some results!!! Hot bod? Nah, I just want to be a 10! HA!